Horses Were Babies Once Too

In addition to my ongoing work in Centered Riding, I've actually begun to take on more horses who need training from the ground up. Let me rephrase that. I've actually begun to take on more horse OWNERS who need training from the ground up. After years of trying to figure out a way to explain the reasoning behind all of the "Revolution in Natural Horsemanship" methods, I think I've finally begun to piece it together so that it makes sense to me and so have begun to share this with other horse lovers.

I feel strongly that teaching people about horse behavior and relationships in the herd has to be done with lots of colorful and meaningful associations to human behavior. No, horses are not human, but no one can deny, that the reason so many people love horses and want to be around them for long periods of time is that they reveal so much to us about our own struggles with confidence and trust and patience. We choose to be with a very large imposing animal, who could potentially harm us, and yet, if we tap into their world for even 20 minutes and make a connection, we feel as if we've discovered the meaning of life. I search and search for better ways to explain how, after 25 years, I've been able to tap into this world for brief moments-some of the most pleasant and rewarding times of my life.



And so, as I say, there's one thing that seems to help humans learn quickly and retain information more than anything else (Read the book "Moonwalking with Einstein" for more details): create some type of association with vivid visual images set in familiar locations , filled with colorful details and lots of humor; a story, if you will, that you will NEVER forget. In the book I mentioned above, the author gives a grocery list of 6 items to remember. In addition to the list, there is an incredibly colorful detailed image of people and situations that are simply unforgettable. Two months later I can still list them.

This story starts from the beginning: When a foal is born, she has the physical characteristics inheritied from her parents. Hair color, eye color, size and shape of her head and eyes, legs and feet-everything. Including her personality. Horses typically have either a shy, reserve, potentially more fearful personality OR they have an assertive, sometimes more pushy or dominant personality. These traits can be very obvious to an outside observer or they can be very subtle. The idea of horses having personalities is not new. The well known Parelli "Horsenalities" video and printed material has lots of details about what distinguishes one from another. But what I've discovered is that the way we approach them is easier to remember if we think of how they were treated as babies.

When a horse is still a baby, the mare allows the individual personality traits to express themselves without much restraint-not pushing the shy/fearful horse too far away or overeacting to the naturally sensitive youngster. Nor does she try to dampen the spirit of the willful and sometimes overconfident dominant horse. She creates safety and security and begins the process by which horses learn to follow a confident leader

A leader-a horse or human who does not become confrontational with the dominant horse, chasing her off or forcing her to constantly defend herself. She does not scare the shy horse by driving her away with no chance to find relief from the ensuing anxiety and/or physical exhaustion. A leader asks for something (usually movement) and gives immediate release of pressure when the horse she chooses to lead, gives the correct response. A good leader knows just how much pressure to put on a horse based on their individual personality. She watches for the reaction she gets and adapts her behavior accordingly.

Not every horse needs to be run in circles to get them to respect the leader. Shy, fearful, reactive horses actually find it incredibly stressful emotionally to be run off and may continue to run and run in a circle or confined area until they appear as if they've checked out mentally.

Ah, but the mother mare cannot continue to "look the other way" when it comes to her baby's behavior. Once the foal becomes large enough to interact safely with the herd, she begins to put limits on how much pushing and shoving and kicking, bucking, leaning her baby is allowed to do. Humans understand this and know that they cannot allow their kids to be out of control after a certain age, clinging and crying and kicking and screaming to get their way. And so, the mare uses direct or driving pressure to move her youngster away from her. For the dominant pushy youngster, this may mean a few kicks and pushes and bites from mom or even being driven forcefully out of the herd until the youngster understands that mom is in charge of her movement and is the only one who can allow her back in to the safety and comfort of the herd. The young one then learns to "ask" to return, keeping a respectful distance as well as a constant eye on the leader when she looks at her, just in case she makes another request. This develops respect and confidence in the leader. If this is not a part of the horse human relationship, the dominant horse will begin to assert itself with physical defensive moves. This can be as small as waving the head and neck to push a human away or as big as biting and kicking when the horse percieves any kind of confrontation.

For the shy, reticent, reactive youngster, mom simply walks away from the foal, creating more distance, only using very slight direct or driving pressure to increase the distance when the foal returns uninvited. The mare understands that for the foal to gain confidence, the separation cannot be done severely or rapidly, but eventually the youngster will need to be on her own, able to interact with other members of the herd as well as new sights and sounds. Like sending them to day care or kindergarten to learn to "play well with others." The shy horse who does not learn to trust humans and see them as leaders, will not adapt to new situations easily, may run in fear if overtly reactive or may freeze and explode when pushed too far. We have all met kids and adults who appear calm on the outside, but when under pressure have done things that seemed out of character-a young man who is very smart and calm, but when put behind the wheel during driver's ed cannot figure out which way to turn at a four way stoplight when in the right lane.

Now that I can explain these behaviors based on the relationship horses have with their moms, it makes sense to my students. Of course, most of them are women who have been moms or have been around kids enough. Heck, they understand because they've been kids before. And I tell them Horses were Babies Once Too.....

Part 2: Now That They Know You're a GOOD Leader!