Sunday, October 17, 2010

Teacher as Student

I'm back from another Centered Riding Clinic. This time it was for instructors who wished to update their CR certification. It's now been more than a year since I met the first of many enthusiastic and energetic people who embrace the teachings of the now legendary Sally Swift. Since last September, I've been able to use my new found skills to enhance my own riding and horsemanship as well as share the information with my students. At this clinic, I was reminded that the foundation of Centered Riding are the four basics, Soft Eyes, Breathing, Building Blocks (Balance) and Centering that works best when we are Grounded. I know I've been using those basics with my teaching but, now I understand them even more and will incorporate them in my daily activities, not just my equine experiences. The clinic, held at the amazing Rhodes River Ranch, was a chance to meet even more people, like myself, who believe in the power of education and the transforming properties of the Centered Riding philosophy when using it in their riding and instruction.

Every time I attend a CR Clinic, I become a student again. I find that it is eye opening in so many ways. As a health professional, I have had a chance on a few occcasions to experience what it feels like to be a patient. The vulnerability, the insecurity, the fear and the uncertainty can be overwhelming. Allowing someone else to dictate the direction of my life for even a short time is not a comfortable feeling for me. When you are the patient, you must let someone else tell you what needs to be done. There is tension and apprehension-our personality dictates how much we "allow" without question. I am usually an active participant in my care because I understand what is going on and the information is not as foreign to me, as it would be to a lay person. What always stays with me after my experience as a patient, though, is the feelings I had for the providers who cared for me. It starts from the moment I meet him or her.

Did the provider engage in conversation with me from the beginning and make me feel as if they were listening or did they immediately dive into what's wrong and what needs to be done? Were they empathetic? Did they answer my questions? Did they try to allay my fears, make me feel more confident in them and in my ability to actively participate in my health care problems, as well as recovery? Did they communicate in a way that made sense to me? Was it an overall positive experience, even if the process involved emotional and or physical stress (sometimes pain is part of the experience)? If the answer is yes to all of these questions, chances are, I will not hesitate to return to that provider when I need care in the future.

The same is true, when I become a student rider of a CR instructor or clinician. It begins with a sense of vulnerability and uncertainty and if a positive connection is not made from the beginning, it can quickly dissolve into a tense experience, physically and emotionally, and an uncomfortable feeling for both horse and rider. This leads to lack of confidence, which creates further tension, until the rider is no longer able to concentrate on their own abilities.

I had just such an experience years ago with an instructor. We had never met and she introduced herself to me. She asked my horse's name only after she expressed several opinions: 1) my horse was too small for me 2) My saddle did not fit me or my horse 3) she did not like the word I used to express my new found experience of balancing myself with seat bones contacting the saddle correctly. 4) She disagreed with a particular method of visualizing a certain muscle in the body to center ourselves, stating that there were more than JUST one and it was incorrect to give credit to that particular muscle. 5) Contradicted me immediately when I explained that the word "allow" when used in riding, to me was not a direction that translated to an active motion in the body.

As you can imagine, I felt immediately deflated emotionally. I loved my horse and had been riding for years. Our relationship had grown and flourished and she had taught me as much, if not more than any instructor I've had in my life. My saddle issues had been ongoing, but I felt I was working with what I had in the best way possible. While I am a long tall person, my horse was certainly not a pony and had the stout, muscular features capable of carrying me without stress or strain. I had been excited and encouraged by the progress I had made with my seat and my balance through a method of releasing tension in one group of muscles of my body, while allowing others to activate. It had improved my balance and centering, further advancing my riding abilities. Being a very procedural person, I liked direction that gave me something I could "do", even if in the process, something passive was happening that made the whole thing work well together. I did understand the process of "allowing" things to happen and go with the feel.

I heard what the instructor said and I knew what she meant, but somehow, the delivery of her words, created emotions in me that translated into uncertainty. With each movement, I questioned my ability, over analyzing my technique and eventually regressed to the beginning rider of my early years. My shoulders dropped, my head rotated when I turned, my weight tipped forward, my feet were no longer evenly weighted in the saddle and my breathing was non existent. I was a mess! How did this happen so quickly?

The first moments of our experience with a new teacher, instructor, doctor, boss, customer service representative, or ANYONE that we look to for help or information, are critical. It's not about them, it's about US. We need to feel confident in their abilities, knowing that they are there for us, listening to our words, understanding our needs, able to communicate with us in a way that makes sense.

As an instructor I am now learning what it means to be grounded emotionally, before I begin a lesson. I will take a deep breath, clear my mind, check in with my own body and release any tension, aware of my surroundings prior to involving my student or her horse. I try to remember to stay balanced when I stand, to use my body correctly and avoid stress on my joints, that creates tension throughout my body, making it more difficult to focus on my student. I give my student a chance to do the same and avoid putting pressure on them to do something in the first 10-15 minutes. Watching them interact with their horse tells me a lot about how their feeling and what the relationship is like at that moment.

It is a wonderful experience to be a teacher. Being able to incorporate my love of horses with my passion for teaching means that I will continue to grow as a person and an equestrian from this moment on. But, I must always remember what it means to be a student. If I have that thought in mind, every time I begin a lesson, I will never fail to create an environment that will promote learning as well as fun for every student. ENJOY THE RIDE!

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